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What’s In Your Inbox?

April 21, 2010

I love checking my email.  Why?  Because I have all kinds of fun things delivered to me everyday!  Things so imaginative I could never have thought of them on my own.  Seriously, it’s stuff like this that makes life worth living.

This next image cracks me up.

When did NASA say that discovering extraterrestrial civilizations is unlikely?  Even elementary astronomy textbooks talk about the Drake equation.  What about the giant dishes we have listening for radio signals emitted by other civilizations?  And how do we account for this strange plaque held here by Carl Sagan, who worked for NASA’s Jet Propulsion Laboratory?  Wasn’t this mounted on Pioneer 10?

But don’t look too much into the facts, you’ll spoil all the fun!  I’d love to attend one of these space camps.  It’d be totally epic to sleep in the mountains in a tent like this…

And while we’re up in the mountains, I’ll invite a cute conspiracy girl over to my tent and we’ll talk all night about the Catholic Nazis and Project Bluebeam!

But what is Project GLADDIO?  Normally I’m pretty up on my conspiracy knowledge as I’ve been getting emails like these for years, but Project GLADDIO is brand new to me.  What is it?  I’m not sure exactly, but maybe the text from the email will help shed a little light on it:

Who Controls the Vatican?
Philip discusses how money was funnelled from Vatican accounts to Bosnia – a place where children in trance were supposedly channeling the spirit of the virgin Mary – Philip explains how former President Clinton made US Military forces available for the bombing of mosques and homes owned by Muslims – and also reveals that Project Gladdio STAY-BEHIND networks were armed and funded by the British and American intelligence services after the end of World War II… Many of the caches of weapons, gold and cash were eventually used by ultra-right-wing Catholic factions who went on to stage many FALSE FLAG terrorist plots…

Philip and Chris discuss the MASONIC INFILTRATION of the Vatican Hierachy and the mysterious P2 “Propaganda Due” masonic lodge whose members are powerful industrialists – who have a covert agenda to usurp demoncracy in Italy and the world in general… Plus the strange case of the Belgian Detroux Affair – which seemingly involves high ranking members of the European noble houses with pedophilia.

Still confused?  Well apparently the Pope, after sexually abusing poor innocent children, slips them into a sort of trance where they summon the power of the virgin Mary, which is then channeled into a laser beam used by the U.S. government as a secret weapon against the Muslims.  Then they go and take all their gold and this money is used to covertly fund more evil terrorist activities.

Get all that?

I hope me and my new girlfriend aren’t interrupted by this guy, “What’s my face doing on your tent?”

But there wouldn’t be any need to worry, because we’ll be among friends.  The alien would have beamed down from his saucer to tell me about the space serpents, who entangle themselves in our brains, and coerce us into doing things we don’t want to do.  He’ll tell us that the only way to purify ourselves of them is to use L. Ron Hubbard’s Dianetics in conjunction with the Church of Scientology’s OT programs to lift our consciousness out of its current quagmire.

What is ORFEUS?
King of the Underworld? Not quite – the ORFEUS-SPAS II satellite is a free flying telescope which is taken up into space inside the payload bay of the Space Shuttle. ORFEUS is designed to analyze the gas signatures of stars outside our own galaxy. It uses Ultra-Violet telescopes to peer into the deepest depths of the universe – revealing very distant objects and showing details which are invisible to the naked eye…

When pointed at the earth’s atmosphere – to every Astronaut’s amazement onboard the Space Shuttle – ORFEUS reveals a cacophony of dozens of unknown objects – some flying at 18,000+ miles per hour – and some santering and wandering around in the upper atmosphere of Planet Earth – some of these objects are small – some are several hundred meters wide… They appear and disappear at will…

We also present the first HD high definition 3D model of the DARK SIDE OF THE MOON – that is, the side of the moon which we never see from Earth…

LITTLE GREEN MEN will continue with several TV specials in the coming weeks – including footage from around the world showing ‘space serpents’, the ‘crown of crowns’ UFOs, cigar shaped UFOs in Russia and Germany and a Special Report on the APOLLO 11 post-flight press conference, featuring Neil Armstrong, Michael Collins and Buzz Aldrin.

But there is a temporary way reach stages of higher consciousness — mushrooms!  But not just any mushroom…

ESP, The Sacred Mushroom and the Big Kahuna:
A film from the archives of Professor Andrija Puharich which recounts a 1960 research trip to Mexico with a Kahuna chief from Hawaii.  The Brujujo Mexican elder who gives hallucinogenic mushrooms to the party of scientists correctly diagnoses a heart problem experienced by one of the party and even correctly identifies an event in the childhood of one of the other explorers – information which he simply could not have known beforehand.  ESP and telepathy are enhanced by the ingestion of sacred mushrooms – and this research trip inspired Doctor Puharich to research the psychic abilities of many people around the world – most notably URI GELLER.  This fascinating piece of archive footage actually proves that ESP abilities are enhanced after eating certain strains of Mexican mushroom.  In fact, there has never been a programme broadcast since which so conclusively proves that ESP and psychic abilities are improved by hallucinogenic mushrooms.  The programme uses stroboscopic lights to enhance the internal ‘minds eye’ ability to perceive different levels of colour information.  One of the research subjects manages to identify a photograph of a desert cactus by just placing his hand on a photo whilst being blindfolded.  This film was broadcast 50 years ago and is still remarkable.

This space camp sounds totally awesome.  First we get stoned on mushrooms, then we have strobe-lights flashing in all sorts of colors and we start to see each other’s pasts.

And who would’ve thought that the pyramids were built by a race of giants!

GIANTS of the Ancient World:
The dinosaur era is still posing some perplexing and very amazing finds for archaeologists – new discoveries in south east India see a giant fossilised creature washed up following the recent asian tsunami. This report also includes photos from Baalbek in the Lebanon – did GIANTS create the ancient megalithic temples of the ancient world? View the slide show and make up your own mind.

Professor Puharich, The Philadelphia Experiment and Resonant Frequency of the Great Pyramid:
In this lecture from Professor Puharich’s archives, we see him discuss the TESLA technologies which saw an entire battleship disappear from sight… And the 7.82Hz resonant frequency of the Great Pyramid. Professor Puharich also discusses his tenure at Stanford University, where he researched the psychic abilities of URI GELLER.

And no conspiracy theory is complete without Satan worship and witches!

And yes, Hitler was a Crusty!  Don’t tell me you’re unaware of the Crusties?  You’re hopeless, I swear!

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