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How To Be An Alpha Male

April 28, 2013

HuffPost blogger Emma Johnson is telling us men that women really want an aggressive, manly man, able to make decisions, and strong in this world.

“When you are an independent woman with lots of responsibilities, many men assume that we want to carry out that strong role all the time. But I need to feel like a woman, and times I enjoy that most are when I am with a man,” Johnson wrote. “If I am being honest with myself, being a woman means — to a degree — being passive. And that requires a man who is — to a degree — the alpha.”

“We feel so afraid to acknowledge that we have this inherent need to be with manly men. We fear that we’re going to give up some of our power,” she said. “I like to be with agressive men, alpha men who are strong in this world and strong with me one on one, but that doesn’t mean I want to give up my right to vote or that I choose to earn less than a man in the workplace. “

So guys, listen up!  You need some role models or the ladies will pass you by every time.  Here’s your first lesson.  If you’re going to be an alpha male, you need to learn how to hold your own, protect your woman, and protect your children — like a boss!

Could you ever picture that man unemployed, depending on a woman to support him?  Are you kidding me?  The same goes with you, alpha-male in the making!  Hoodlums giving you trouble?  You have to whip sense into them, call up your buddies at the construction site and find them all jobs.  You’re not only a provider, you also help other young men become providers as well.  Something breaks, you’re there to fix it.  Grass getting a little high?  Never!  The lawn’s always mowed, flower-beds well kept.  Car needs tuned?  You’re all over it.  Taking notes?

Next you need lessons in loyalty.  When your friend’s in trouble, do you cry in your little corner, “The world’s so hard!  Why are people so mean!”  No!  You own the situation, like the Fonz.

When trouble strikes, you’re there.  You’re there for your friends, there for your children, there for your woman.  And see what he did there?  Snap the fingers, the woman comes.  That’s aggressive, that’s an alpha male.  Strong women worry they’ll be giving up their power when dating wuss-balls.  But what about the Fonz?  He’s glowing with power and authority.

Now you need to learn confidence.  Even if you can barely speak English, own yourself and never back down.  You’ve had so many children, you’re everyone’s father.  Remember that.

And when the forces of evil attack from the shadows, who’s going to protect the weak?  The family?  Who fights for freedom and liberty?  Obviously it’s got to be you, alpha-male, honor-bound protector of the innocent!

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