Peace Of Mind – Part II: Growth From Evil

In my past entry on ‘Peace Of Mind’, I mentioned that various frames of mind exist exist which can view evils as opportunities to grow, and leave you in times of great trouble with peace of mind.

I received a comment asking how this was so.  I will now explain how this works.
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Handling Rejection – Part II

Though in Part I I covered the main underlying methods of dealing with rejection, I figured I’d write this entry as a sort of supplement, talking about all the other thought and things that happened after the event.

In Part 1 I mostly talked about what NOT to do.  Most of that stuff, because I know it to be “bad basis”, didn’t even cross my mind.  After I figured out she wasn’t interested, I went for a long walk, and thought about all kinds of things, which though related, were also of a much different nature.
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How To Handle Rejection Like A Man

There’s a girl I’ve known now for several years, and over time we’ve developed a friendship.  During all our talks over the years, I’ve grew fond of her, and eventually decided that I should see if she’s developed feelings for me, like I have for her.

I sent her an email telling her how I felt about her, and how I still have a lot of business related work I need to get done, but that maybe she’d be interested in something between us, after I get some of this other stuff out of the way.  She had never viewed me as anything more than a friend, and rejected the offer.  What I’m going to write about now is how do you handle a situation like this, without it destroying you emotionally?
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Peace Of Mind

When I wake up in the morning the only thing I hear is the air conditioner, gently blowing into the room.  I get up out of bed, sit up for a second, and begin to think what I will do for the day.  I wonder which books I’m going to read, when I will go for my walk, and if I have work to do, what time of the day I’ll do that work, and for how long I’ll work on it.  Then I go about the day, and follow this vague sort of outline, until I grow too tired, and go to sleep.

That is how things happen just about every day for me.  There’s no arguing with anybody.  No worrying about my future.  No nervous break-outs about upcoming events, nor regrets as to things I’ve done in the past.  No worrying what others think of me – whether I looked stupid, or said the wrong thing, or did the right thing. There’s no stress at all, and there’s no boredom.  I feel no apathy. Sometimes I get excited, normally when I come to a solution to a problem.

When I sit still, my mind is as idle as my body, and goes only where I direct it.  If I tell it to think on a mathematical philosophy problem, I begin thinking.  If I sit down to read a book my attention is fully devoted to the book.  When I go for a walk, I can either admire the world around me, enjoy the breeze, and breathe the fresh air, or I can lose myself in some deep philosophical problem, pondering a solution.

I seem to exist in this frame of mind most of my day, and I wanted to write tonight regarding how such a state of mind is achieved.  I attribute near all peace I experience to ten different causes, not in any particular order.

1. Abandonment of the value of possessions
2. Losing the self, both in my own eyes, and in the eyes of others
3. High valuation of knowledge for its own sake
4. Loss of fear of death
5. Giving the benefit of the doubt when I am wronged
6. Continually wishing others well, even when they do not do the same for me
7. Various frames of mind which view evils as opportunties to grow
8. Knowledge of history, and realistic expectations
9. Belief that people can do anything, and that I can do anything
10. Not feeling like I’ve come short of any standard I “should” be

I began to write about each of these points in detail, but it came to 20 pages, and I was barely to point 3, and I was only skimming over material even at that length.  I’ll have to leave it to a bullet-point list then, and these are the 10 items.